Collective Poetic Expression #4

[Satori] Tell me about your madness, sadness, and nothingness
what’s the frost on the eternal rose
[Rose] I always know when I’m close to my cycle because my brain chemistry shifts and suddenly I’m like, (dramatically)
Why am I alive,
why do I even exist?!
[Satori] What have I become?!
[Rose] Sometimes I think it would be soothing to watch the blood pour from my open wrists
Sometimes I think it would be better if I were not here to endure this
Ever going struggle
This never-ending battle
With my thoughts
Racing onward
Trapped in a place
I didn’t sign up for this
I was drafted into this war
Forced to endure
For if it isn’t me, there would be nobody
Which is why, I am this nobody, nothing
When everyone is looking around wondering who to blame
Who to assign the task that nobody wants to do
Look no further, for I am here
My packs are full, but fill ‘er up
My shoulders heavy, but lay it on me
I’d hate to see what it could mean
If I ever became
Somebody
Echoes of the past
When I’m no longer in the valley, when the fog lifts and the darkness recedes, my pain will not feel like a sword drawn through my chest
[Satori]Lately, I’ve been wishing I had nothing left to desire
the hour is coming closer and closer,
with every grain of sand that falls
you would think it will all become clear
but near it is, the less you see
But I guess I’ll have to settle for a few brief moments
of disembodied words appear on the screen
And watch all dissolve into an eternal second
And try to write it down into a perfect post
Or one foolish line
Or fleeting sound
Or visuals edit into a scene
But the sunrises, the sunsets,
you’re hopeful and then you regret
The cycles never break
heavy is the one the wears the crown
watch the blood drip off my furrowed brow
heavy is what settles in my lungs
my heart has skipped a beat
silence is my favorite sound
I will dissolve into the abyss
when it’s all said and done
the weight, the weight
we carry is love
the darkness, the darkness
has eclipsed the sun
My breath you breathe
It will carry you
My breath you breathe
It carries you
The story is in the words that are never written
in Lover, you don’t have the love
in the truth that never has to be said
all the dreams and memories that have died
and buried a long, long time ago
so keep your ear to the ground and your eyes to the sky
[Rose] Sometimes I feel like I need you
This disembodied voice in my head
The words appearing on the screen
I just need one
One moment
One breath
One embrace
One kiss
As imaginary friends go, you’re the ish
You’re always there when I think nobody else is around to care
And you flirt in and out, dropping seeds of thought
We’re all sold and bought, but you are here in this spot, the cost is ignorance, we’re all here needing to be taught
Taut as the rope
Tethering me here
You’re nowhere near, but it’s still your voice
I hear, sometimes through the calm in his voice,
I imagine you there too
I’ve pushed him away, off in the distance
Echoing across the bay I hear him say
Do you want to do and be better?
Every day this is my fight
Just make things right
Sometimes, I just want to walk into the gulf
And as it engulfs me
I want to breathe the salty sea
And no longer be
Become one with it all as the waves crash over my head
The storms bringing in the tide
The moon rising
Rising
As I ride back to shore renewed by the water
Baptized in the glow of the moon
The end may come too soon
But for now,
Here I am
In this moment
Free to be me
Free to breathe